You are currently browsing the tag archive for the ‘violent death’ tag.

Violent Loss Resources Newsletter,  August 1, 2016
News you can use … collected for you in July. (Scroll down to see all)

Contents will vary somewhat month to month, as we close out this month, our contents include:

            Topic of the Month:  Prosecuting the Case: Survivor Voices

            Question of the Month:  What happened in your case?

            Quote

            News: Two Day Conference 2017: Traumatic Grief after Violent Dying

            Inspiration: “Not Forgotten” Project in Chicago contains  photos and interviews

            Resource of the Month: Victim Law

            What you missed last month           



Topic of the Month: Chapter Seven, Prosecuting the Case
: The importance and complexity involved in this topic is large enough that this topic will continue next month as well.  This month the  focus will be on Survivor Experiences.

 Excerpts from Murder Survivors Handbook webMurder_Survivor-front-cover-sticker-2500web

Here are what some Survivors have to say about this topic:

The FBI had a prime suspect in my parents’ deaths—my younger brother. They wanted to prosecute, but the U.S. attorney’s office refused, saying that without bodies, with little forensic evidence, and having an unreliable witness (my youngest sister, who failed two lie-detector tests and vowed to lie in court), that the odds of getting a guilty verdict were too low to risk incurring jeopardy. (Harrier)

When the case stalled, I met with the U.S. attorney assigned to the case. He explained why there would likely be no prosecution, no trial—the case was circumstantial; there were no bodies; there was little forensic evidence; and my sister was not a reliable witness. He did not want to risk incurring jeopardy by losing the case. (Harrier)

Often it will feel like it is more about the system than it is about justice. It will seem like every consideration is being given to the Defense, on behalf of the Defendant….(Valeria)

 Our charges were worked out behind closed doors with input from the Judge. We were advised up front that the justice system did not allow tailoring charges to increase the available sentencing options. We were given a voice only in the crafting of the plea offers, and then it was advisory in nature. We did, however, feel that the State took into account our perspective and the degree of concurrence we expressed was communicated to the judge at sentencing. ( JJ )’

It was a time when our private and public self felt so disconnected, and the hard work we had put into managing our emotions and grief was challenged on a regular basis throughout the trial. (Valeria)

  I was told that my telling of domestic abuse was not relevant to the case, but I feel that it was the reason my sister was murdered; because I left my abusive boyfriend, and he couldn’t find me, so he found my sister and murdered her.(Kaila)

 When court comes into session, they ask if the judge, the recorder, the prosecutor, the defendant, and the defendant’s attorney is present. They don’t even care or ask if the victim’s family is there. In a lot of cases, I think the defense would be very happy if we were not there. (Kaila)

Twenty-eight years later an arrest was made. After two years of court hearings, a plea agreement was reached for 2nd degree murder. (Halia)

Means, Motive, and Opportunity

The prosecution of a case does not mean motive has to be proven, but the jury does want to know why it happened. Did the defendant have the means, motive, and opportunity to do what he or she is charged with? In our Survivor Writer stories, some of the motives they believe were:

Marina: Oldest motive in the book. Dad planned to end his relationship with his abusive girlfriend, and she was enraged at the loss of a wealthy man to support her lifestyle! …

Harrier: He got caught doing something wrong.

Rose: Prevent having his life disrupted by his son’s existence; it would ruin him . . . child support was secondary.

Kaila:Revenge.” How dare I leave the man that loved me. He Murdered my sister because I left him.

Yvonne: Random act, opportunity, found someone alone and vulnerable.

Mary: I do personally feel that these 6 teens were stupid and immature. I believe they were bored and thought it was okay to get their kicks that night by beating someone up and causing someone an injury….

Question of the Month – What happened in your case? Subscribe now … and follow up to let us know your thoughts by adding your comments about anything in this article.

Quote: Though you can never really be prepared for the unique challenges that will come your way, we hope that by relating our experiences and what we learned in our journey … you will gain insight and confidence by which to navigate the process, should you ever have to. (Valeria)



News: Two Day “Traumatic Grief after Violent Dying”
Conference being planned for April 8 & 9, 2017 in  San Diego, CA. Sponsors include Ted Rynearson, MD Virginia Mason Medical Center, and Sid Zisook, MD; University of California, San Diego. Planning Committee includes Connie Saindon, Founder of Survivors of Violent Loss; Ilanit Young, San Diego VA Center; Linda Pena, Director of S.D.DA’s Victim Assistance Center;  Charles Nelson, Trauma Recovery Center; Kathleen Barnum, Elizabeth Hospice; Mary Edwards, Victim Assistance Coordinating Council with generous financial support from Carmela Caldera. *Mark your calendar.



Inspiration:
Not Forgotten: Chicago Street Memorials.  Journalist Ann-Marie Cusac and former Emergency Room MD Thomas Ferrella have teamed up to produce interviews and photography for a show at the Cage Gallery 18 S. Michigan Ave., Chicago running from September 29- December 3rd, 2016. Here is a link for more information for you poster



Resource of the Month: Victim Law: https://www.victimlaw.org/

Victim Law is a searchable database of victims’ rights legal provisions including federal, state, and territorial statutes, tribal laws, state constitutional amendments, court rules, administrative code provisions, and summaries of related court decisions and attorney general opinions.

Victim Law currently contains legal provisions relating to the following 10 basic rights of crime victims:

  • The right to attend and be present at criminal justice proceedings;
  • The right to be heard in the criminal justice process, including the right to confer with the prosecutor and submit a victim impact statement at sentencing, parole, and other similar proceedings;
  • The right to be informed of proceedings and events in the criminal justice process, including the release or escape of the offender, legal rights and remedies, and available benefits and services, and access to records, referrals, and other information;
  • The right to protection, including protection from intimidation and harassment;
  • The right to privacy;
  • The right to apply for crime victim compensation;
  • The right to restitution from the offender;
  • The right to the expeditious return of personal property seized as evidence whenever possible;
  • The right to a speedy trial and other proceedings free from unreasonable delay; and
  • The right to enforcement of these rights and access to other available remedies.


What you missed last month:

Topic of the Month:  The Criminal Justice Process

            Question of the Month- What tips do you have?

            News: Orlando 

            Inspiration: I’ll cry again

            Book Resource: Accidental Truth



Like us on  Facebook:

Subscribe now … and follow up to let us know your thoughts by adding your comments about anything in this article.

Violent Loss Resources Team — Contact us

Connie Saindon: csaindon@svlp.org
Larry Edwards: larry@larryedwards.com

 

 

Advertisements

What do a nurse, Director of Families and Friends of Murder Victims, a teacher, a Chaplin, Directors of Restorative Justice, therapist, missionary and survivor have in common? They are members of a trained team in San Bernardino, and they need our support.

They have prepared for the past three years to be ready — to be ready for their work and support survivors of violent loss. Many are driven to make a difference from their own grief stories to show how they have survived. Many continue a career in aiding humanity, all committed to knowing how they can help survivors after murder and other violent deaths.

It was an honor to be among such incredible people again the week just before Thanksgiving. They had all given up there weekend to spend three days together learning more about The Journey, a ten week support group.

2013
sister 2013web

2014

DSC_0007 ssiters Trainee group 2013

2015

IMG_2654

They have formed a team that will support each other as they take the tools that The Journey provides them in working with others with the ideas and support from the evidence-based model Restorative Retelling by Edward Rynearson, MD.

The Journey: Learning to Live with Violent Loss, with its accompanying audio recordings, will be released December 8, 2015. This is an updated version of the book published in 2008 by Connie Saindon. Three more real stories have been added along with more examples of Survivor Heroes, Missions and support-group guidelines. The book will be available on Amazon.com and other retail outlets, along with her other book, the award winning Murder Survivors Handbook: Real-Life Stories, Tips and Resources.

To support the San Bernardino Team, contact Anna Hamilton, Assoc. Director of Restorative Justice at 909-475-5474 or ahamilton@sbdiocese.org.

For more information about the books and support-group training, contact Connie Saindon, MFT, Founder of Survivors of Violent Loss and Violent Loss Resources, at 858-699-7700 or connie.saindon@gmail.com

Links

Connie Saindon

It’s official. Murder Survivor’s Handbook: Real-Life Stories, Tips & Resources is launched and available for purchase at Amazon.com, Barnes & Noble online, and through traditional retail outlets.
Murder Survivor's Handbook: Real-life Stories, Tips & Resources
Written by Connie Saindon, MA, MFT—along with many other voices—the book is being formally released on Sept. 25, 2014, to coincide with the National Day of Remembrance for Murder Victims. [Read Connie’s essay: Remembering Our Murdered Loved Ones.]

“Many survivors and co-victims of murder asked me to write this book so those who must make this tragic journey will have a helping hand,” Saindon says. “I am saddened that there is a need for this book, but I am happy that we were able to pull this together in the interest of helping others.”

When a loved one is murdered, the survivors—the co-victims—are plunged into a head-spinning world of traumatic grief, criminal investigation, criminal justice, and the long-term consequences of violent loss. Sensational news coverage may compound the trauma of their loss.

Murder Survivor’s Handbook: Real-life Stories, Tips & Resources helps these survivors wend their way on this overwhelming journey they never chose to take.

Saindon’s professional as well as personal experience have given her a unique perspective that few others have. Not only did she learn first-hand about criminal death following the murder of her sister, she learned that she is a Survivor in every sense of the word. However, she also found that little was known about the impact of murder on survivors.

This book fills that void for the survivors, the co-victims of murder. It provides information, resources, and strategies for learning to live with the aftermath of a homicide, including safety issues, dealing with the criminal justice system, addressing the news media, and coping with traumatic grief, while preserving the memory of a loved one.

Also in the book, Survivor Writers describe their own experiences and, through their tips and suggestions, lend a helping hand to those who follow in their footsteps.

The book also encourages the readers to write down their own feelings and experiences as they take this journey no one ever wants to take, but in which they had no choice.

The Foreword to the book is written by Edward K. Rynearson, MD, Medical Director, Separation and Loss Services Program, Virginia Mason Medical Center in Seattle, WA, and the author of Retelling Violent Death.

In prerelease sales, the book became a Hot New Release at Amazon.com in the Criminal Procedure Law category, and climbed onto Amazon’s Best Seller list in that category as well.

All proceeds from the sale of the book go to the Survivors of Violent Loss Program to provide books to those who may need assistance.

For bulk purchases of the book, please contact the author or Wigeon Publishing.

Praise for the book:

This handbook is the absolutely perfect tool for survivors of homicide victims and those professionals who work to support them. Through the voices of survivors, the stark realities of learning to live with homicide are clearly exposed. The incredible depth of sorrow, daunting financial impact and the long-term challenges that survivors face are effectively presented. The wealth of information contained in this handbook needs to be on the bookshelves of everyone who interacts with survivors of homicide.

—Carol Gaxiola, mother of Jasmine Gaxiola
Director/Victim Advocate, Homicide Survivors, Inc.

 

 

The book is rich in content. It is the banquet of life-sustaining information that I did not have 15 years ago.

—Marina, Survivor/Co-victim

 

This is exactly the book I would have loved to have had so I wouldn’t have made so many mistakes; I would have had some idea how this entire process works.

—Dayna Herrroz, Survivor/Co-victim
Peer Advocate/Violent Loss

Details:
• Nonfiction: Death, Grief, Bereavement
• Publisher: Wigeon Publishing
• Wholesale distribution: Ingram
• Size, print edition: 8.5 x 11
• Pages: 244
• Formats:
• paperback; ISBN: 978-0-9896913-0-7; $19.95
• e-book: Kindle, iBooks, Nook, Kobo, etc.; $7.99 (to be released in October)

About the Author
Connie Saindon, author, Murder Survivor's Handbook: Real-life Stories, Tips & Resources Connie Saindon is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and among the few specialists in the field of violent death bereavement. She is the founder of the nonprofit Survivors of Violent Loss Program in San Diego, which began at the University of California-San Diego outpatient clinic in 1998. Her commitment to violent loss bereavement is related to the murder of her sister, aged 17, in 1961.

She is author of The Journey: Ten Steps to Learning to Live with Violent Death (2008), an adaption of the Restorative Retelling Model for adult self-help and paraprofessionals. She also is a contributing author of Violent Death, Resilience and Intervention Beyond the Crises (2006).

When not pursuing her professional interests, Saindon may be found kayaking in the Atlantic or Pacific oceans, skiing, walking her dog, or taking photographs. A native New Englander, Saindon splits her time between Boothbay, ME, and San Diego, CA.

Contact

For additional information or to schedule an interview:

Connie Saindon
858-699-7700
csaindon@svlp.org

Learn more at: Murder Survivor’s Handbook: Real-life Stories, Tips & Resources

By Connie Saindon

Murder. It’s a fact of life that never goes away. Nor does murder’s impact on the survivors: those who must deal with a horrific new reality in their lives.

On Sept. 25, the National Day of Remembrance of Murder Victims, we will be reminded of this fact as survivors gather to memorialize their murdered loved ones.

Crime rates have dropped in major cities nationwide. Nonetheless, there are roughly 15,000 homicides in the U.S. each year, according to government agencies. The FBI Crime Clock estimates one person is murdered in the United States every 35.6 minutes. These statistics do not include suicide or violent deaths due to negligence or catastrophe.

In San Diego County, the murder rate in 2013 fell to 70 homicides from 110 in 2012. Even so, anything above zero is unacceptable.

Murder often gets sensational headlines in news coverage, but the survivors and the challenges they face in the aftermath of murder typically get short shrift. Yet, the murder of a loved one is a death that no one “gets over”; there is no closure. Seven to ten people are seriously impacted by each violent death, and this “collateral damage” accumulates incrementally each year. There is a potential of 150,000 murder survivors impacted each year, meaning that today millions of Americans live under this shadow of murder and violent death.

For most people, it happens to someone else, to someone else’s mother or father, son or daughter, sister or brother. Until it happens to them. Suddenly, following that phone call or knock on the door, the survivors—the co-victims—find themselves in a mind-numbing whirl of disbelief and chaos. Their world crumbles around them as they have to not only deal with their grief, but the criminal justice system, an intrusive news media, and perhaps a life-time of parole hearings. They have a new and public “murder” identity. Who they were before is changed forever.

Survivors’ questions are many: Is this true? Who did this? Are we safe? What do I do now? Who can I trust? Survivors often say: “We have been given a life sentence for a crime we didn’t commit.” Their world is shattered. They don’t know where to turn for help. The resources, while growing, are still scant.

Similar to our soldiers, many survivors are at risk for PTSD and other health problems, such as depression and substance abuse. They may be unable to return to work or school for an extended period of time. Thus, murder has a significant impact not only on individuals and families, but society as a whole.

To increase awareness of this socially important challenge, Congress designated a National Day of Remembrance of Murder Victims to be recognized annually on Sept. 25. This year, survivors throughout that nation will come together to remember and honor their loved ones. One of the key aspects in these events is that the survivors have an opportunity to talk about who their loved one was, before he or she was murdered.

In San Diego, the annual River of Remembrance event was held on Saturday, Sept. 20, at 10 a.m, at the Crime Victims Oak Garden, which was established in honor of murder victim Cara Knott. More information about the event is available at svlnetwork.wordpress.com.

__________

Connie Saindon is a murder survivor, licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and the author of Murder Survivor’s Handbook: Real-Life Stories, Tips & Resources, which is being released on Sept. 25. She is the founder of the nonprofit Survivors of Violent Loss Program in San Diego and initiated the River of Remembrance event.

New Book

 

Murder Survivor’s Handbook

helps family members adapt to

and navigate the aftermath of murder

 

Release date: September 25, 2014

 

Murder Survivor's Handbook: Real-life Stories, Tips & ResourcesWhen a loved one is murdered, the survivors—the co-victims—are plunged into a head-spinning world of traumatic grief, criminal investigation, criminal justice, and the long-term consequences of violent loss. Sensational news coverage may compound the trauma of their loss.

Murder Survivor’s Handbook: Real-life Stories, Tips & Resources helps these survivors wend their way on this overwhelming journey they never chose to take.

Written by Connie Saindon, MA, MFT—along with many other voices—the book will be formally released on Sept. 25, 2014, to coincide with National Day of Remembrance for Murder Victims.

The book will be available in print and ebook formats.

Saindon’s professional as well as personal experience have given her a unique perspective that few others have. Not only did she learn first-hand about criminal death following the murder of her sister, she learned that she is a Survivor in every sense of the word. However, she also found that little was known about the impact of murder on survivors.

Murder Survivor’s Handbook: Real-life Stories, Tips & Resources fills that void for the survivors, the co-victims of murder. It provides information, resources, and strategies for learning to live with the aftermath of a homicide, including safety issues, dealing with the criminal justice system, addressing the news media, and coping with traumatic grief, while preserving the memory of a loved one.

Also in the book, Survivor Writers describe their own experiences and, through their tips and suggestions, lend a helping hand to those who follow in their footsteps.

The Foreword to the book is written by Edward Rynearson, MD, Medical Director, Separation and Loss Services Program, Virginia Mason Medical Center in Seattle, WA, and the author of Retelling Violent Death.

Praise for the book:

Details:
• Nonfiction: Death, Grief, Bereavement
• Publisher: Wigeon Publishing
• Wholesale distribution: Ingram
• Publication date: September 25, 2014
• Size, print edition: 8.5 x 11
• Pages: 244
• Formats:
• paperback; ISBN: 978-0-9896913-0-7; $19.95
• e-book: Kindle, iBooks, Nook, Kobo, etc.; $7.99

Praise for the book:

This is exactly the book I would have loved to have had so I wouldn’t have made so many mistakes; I would have had some idea how this entire process works.

—Dayna Herrroz, Survivor/Co-victim
Peer Advocate/Violent Loss

 

This book is wonderful. You covered all the steps that victims have to deal with. The chapters are broken down and very easy to read and follow. The resource section after each topic is great.

—Rose Madsen, Families &
Friends of Murder Victims, Inc.

 

This book is fantastic! It will be so helpful to survivors, professionals and our colleagues working with Homicide Survivors.

—Director, Crime Victims Assistance
Unit, District Attorney’s Office

 

About the Author
connie saindon, author, Murder Survivor's Handbook: Real-life Stories, Tips & Resources Connie Saindon is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and among the few specialists in the field of violent death bereavement. She is the founder of the nonprofit Survivors of Violent Loss Program in San Diego, which began at the University of California-San Diego outpatient clinic in 1998. Her commitment to violent loss bereavement is related to the murder of her sister, aged 17, in 1961.

She is author of The Journey: Ten Steps to Learning to Live with Violent Death (2008), an adaption of the Restorative Retelling Model for adult self-help and paraprofessionals. She also is a contributing author of Violent Death, Resilience and Intervention Beyond the Crises (2006).

When not pursuing her professional interests, Saindon may be found kayaking in the Atlantic or Pacific oceans, skiing, walking her dog, or taking photographs. A native New Englander, Saindon splits her time between Boothbay, ME, and San Diego, CA.

Contact

For additional information or to schedule an interview:

Connie Saindon
858-699-7700
csaindon@svlp.org

Learn more at: Murder Survivor’s Handbook: Real-life Stories, Tips & Resources

Customize Rituals for the Holidays

To ease pain of loss and traumatic grief

By Connie Saindon, MA, LMFT

Founder of the Survivors of Violent Loss Network


It is well known that anniversary dates and holidays, especially the first one, can be difficult for those who’s loved one has passed away. When this loss is an unnatural death, holidays can seem unbearable and insurmountable. Thoughts of merriment may arouse feelings of guilt and worries of being disloyal. Life is shattered for those who have lost a loved one to a violent death and there are three basic assumptions that are shattered after traumatic events as such. They are: life has meaning, the world is safe, and I have worth.[1] These issues add to the burden for traditional days.

Rituals, ceremonies, and symbols are necessary for the management of fears and the adaptation to changes necessary in relationships after death.[2] Rituals serve to acknowledge change without threatening the overall social order and allow one emotional engagement along with creating a safe distance to ease the overwhelming pain of loss. Ceremonies help with adapting to what has happened and work to compartmentalize the review of losses amid holiday reminders. Symbols help replace painful intrusions and memories. An example of this is when Ann worried about what she would do with the neck and tail of the turkey at Thanksgiving. She stated that her brother, who was a homicide victim the summer before, always claimed the turkey parts every year. This holiday, she ate the tail in honor of her brother. She chuckled about her experience saying: ” I don’t know what he ever saw in them: they’re all fat!” Ann moved from being frozen about what to do, into an activity that honored her brother and gave her an unexpected laugh; something she had been unable to do since his death.

The work of Family Therapists’ Evan Imber Black and Janine Roberts,[3] emphasize the importance of rituals for many life events. They recommend setting up a separate activity prior to a holiday to acknowledge their loved one. An example would be setting aside a special night and inviting friends or family to bring favorite foods for an informal gathering. This special time could also be a time when photos are gathered to begin a memory album. This album could be worked on annually with more photos and stories collected each year. My family did this to help remember our sister who was a murder victim in 1961. Each family member selected photos and stories for their page and we continue to add to our album each year.

Not doing a special and separate activity tends to burden stressful holidays even more. Hoping to slip past such events without overwhelming reminders is difficult to do. A special time before the holiday can both honor the memory and mark the loss of your loved one. This frequently reduces the strain of the actual holiday.

It is important that rituals and ceremonies be customized. When one has lost an infant, doing an album may not work as there may be few photos and stories. One father who’s young son was murdered has a ritual whereby he goes to a country store and buys his mother a new “snowbaby” ornament that she started collecting in honor of her grandson. Another father who states “heroin murdered my son” is heard singing songs at benefits from the CD that his son helped him write.

To develop your own rituals, consider some of the following ideas and share them with those struggling to cope. Your rituals will give others ideas when their thinking is blocked due to SUGS- sudden upsurges of grief.[4] Activities can include the telling of stories; around a fireplace, or bonfire; going to the burial site and praying, chanting, singing, serving the needy, making charitable contributions, doing a difficult feat such as a hike, balloon rides, or a surfboard paddleout. Items to use for rituals could be candles, rosemary (for remembrance), seeds, sand, feathers, balloons, crayons, rocks, ribbon, music, stars, and irises (for hope).


[1] Janoff-Bulman, R., 1992. Shattered assumptions, toward a new psychology of trauma, The Free Press, Macmillan, Inc. New York.

[2]Goffman, E., 1971. Relations in public. New York: Harper and Row.

[3]Imber-Black, E., Roberts, J., 1992. Rituals for our times. New York: Harper Collins

[4]Rando, T., 1993. Treatment of complicated mourning. Champaign, IL: Research Press.

Connie Saindon is author of The Journey: Ten Steps to Learning to Live with Violent Death and contributing author of Violent Death: Resilience and Intervention Beyond the Crisis. Ms Saindon teaches on online course on PTSD and Violent Death.

Contact Connie for more information about books, training and consultations.
www.svlp.org csaindon@svlp.org

Dear Friends and Families,

Enclosed is the information about the very successful year the Survivors of Violent Loss has had. Our work has extended to as far away as Thailand this year. There have been many who you know have cared about what happens to those who lose a loved one in an unnatural way.

Happiest of Holidays,
Connie Saindon

Survivors of Violent Loss Program 2008 Accomplishments

SVLP has had a banner year, despite a shoe-string budget

and heavy reliance on volunteer time!

Served over 200 families and caregivers

Held a Ten Year Anniversary Celebration sponsored by The San Felipe Humanitarian Foundation

Conducted a Two day Training, Violent Death Bereavement: Interventions for an Emerging Field with Ted Rynearson, MD at University of California San Diego Medical Center

·Published The Ten Year Anniversary Photo log of the Survivors of Violent Loss Program, Special Edition by C. Saindon (available)

Provided in service training on The San Diego Survivors of Violent Loss Program for over 30 mental health staff members at Balboa Naval Hospital

15 people and agencies attended the River of Remembrance

Over 50 people and agencies attended the Candle Vigil activities during Crime Victims Week

Provided training for Hmong in Thailand

Published The Journey Workbook and CD: an Individual Adult Survivors Workbook by C. Saindon (available)

Received Determination Letter for Nonprofit 501(c)3 status (June 30, 2008

Presented at Two Day Seattle Conference: Restorative Retelling: Creative Revisions, Virginia Mason Medical Center

Launched Online Course: PTSD and Violent Death Bereavement at University of California San Diego. Students have taken the course for general interest earning 9 CEU units

Compiled pre and post screening data covering ten years work on over 200 clients

Your Support is our Mission

This workbook includes a one-hour Calming Exercises CD.

See Order Information Below.

“The recently published, ‘The Journey – An Individual Workbook Kit’ is a wonderful and worthwhile addition to the field of Violent Death Material. The current amount of material in this field is quite sparse and ‘The Journey’ will prove to be valuable for both professionals working with this population and for the co-victim as well. ‘The Journey’ is unique in that the material can be used both in groups and individually and therefore will serve a multitude of purposes heretofore not available.”

Deborah Spungen

“Connie Saindon has brought the theoretical into the practical with this user-friendly workbook for family and friends of those who have died traumatically. In addition, therapists and support group leaders will find many helpful tools here. Experiencing this workbook will help people move through their grieving journey with authenticity and eventually find themselves more resilient.”

Janice Harris Lord

“The Journey Workbook is a much needed and useful aid for adult survivors of violent death. Thoughtfully written, it respects the individual grieving process that each person goes through after having a loved one violently killed and offers specific tools to help calm the mind and body.

Alison Salloum, Ph.D

The Journey can be ordered by contacting us or sending your payment and contact information to:

Survivors of Violent Loss Program

2333 First Ave, Suite 204

San Diego, CA 92101

Phone: 619-685-0005

Fax:619-685-0042

svlp@svlp.org

http://www.svlp.org

Thumbs Up and Thumbs Down

This section of devoted to tips about our world that we can share with each other. Recently we sent out an announcement shared by the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention about the upcoming movie Happenings and cautioned those of us who live with and work with Violent Death about it’s disturbing stories. Happenings were given a Thumbs Down. We want to invite you to send us examples of areas that you, and we know it is each of our own ideas, to share with each other. After violent death, moving in the world is different and helping support experiences that may help or hinder the emotional mine field supports our belief that “ Together we can…” learn to live with what has happened better. Feel free to send us your ideas for our consideration to post for others. Although posts are completely the ownership of the author, we reserve the right to post or not and to edit all suggestions.

Movie: Sweeny Todd-Thumbs Down

I love many movies that Johnnie Depp has starred in. So, when this movie musical, Sweeny Todd, was considered award worthy, I rented it. It wasn’t long into the movie before I stopped it and knew it wasn’t something I could enjoy. Too many bloody murderous scenes for me. So I give Sweeny Todd a Thumbs Down. C. Saindon

Movie: Winged Migration– Thumbs Up

This movie documentary has amazing photography and wonderful music with very little narration. It invites us to live the life of birds and shows how amazing they are. The movie is a study of the life of migrating birds, some that travel up to 3,000 miles twice a year. As with life, there are some tragic moments but the predominate time is spent in awe with these birds and how capable they are. So I give Winged Migration a Thumbs Up. C. Saindon

Book: Apples and Oranges– Thumbs Up

Written by Marie Brenner about her life with her brother, two only children in the same family. She writes about the distance and discord between them intertwined with moments only of joy. A writer for the New Yorker and Vanity Fair, her attempts to write other things didn’t work. She realized that she needed to write about the story of her and her brother after he committed suicide. New York Times Critic, Michiko Kakutani, gives the book an unqualified rave: “ Ms. Brenner uses the prism of her love and grief for her brother –and her bewilderment too- to create a haunting portrait.” This book gets my Thumbs Up.

Survivors of Violent Loss exists to build a lifeline of hope and healing by providing support and education to those who live and work with violent death. Coping isn't easy. Survivors of Violent Loss can help. www.svlp.org (619) 685-0005

Sections